Those Sleepless Nights

 

On March 9th, I was again preparing to make my way to the hospital for surgery #2. This time I knew more of what to expect. I was informed that this surgery would be a lot more extensive than the last. In my first surgery they made three small incisions robotically which meant healing could take place a lot faster. This time, however, I was expected to be out of work for 6 weeks and internal healing would take up to 8 months. I went into the hospital just like the last time not knowing when I would be able to go home. I did expect to stay a day or two based off of my last experience. I was in surgery for nearly three hours. Upon waking up I learned they had removed the rest of the left ovary, left fallopian tube, omentum, appendix and 18 lymph nodes, and although granulosa cell tumors are typically unilateral (affecting only one ovary) he did survey my right side where he found a cyst on that ovary as well and burst it. I woke up in much more pain than I remembered the last time. And as before, I was greeted with friends and family who supported me throughout this journey.

Night one: I spent alone trying to sleep as often as I could between nurses who needed blood work, just wanted to check on me, or were providing pain medications and checking for clots or any other abnormalities. I was alone although I had a roommate. But I was alone in this hospital without my husband. He couldn’t stay because hospital policy didn’t allow it if I had a roommate and so I spent many hours that night and what turned into a week in the hospital talking to God. I found solace during those late hours when everyone else was sleeping, talking to the only one who held my future in the palm of His hands. The only one who could give me peace in this time of storm. A reason to smile although I didn’t know what lay ahead, but He did. So I spent many hours praying, reading scriptures, journaling my thoughts and writing an autobiography. 

 I don’t think I mentioned that the two weeks between surgery 1 and 2 I recalled looking at myself in the mirror for the first time in a while and it was at that moment that the Lord spoke to me. I was reminded that many years ago as a kid I was given a vision that “when I grew up” I would be an author and would write an autobiography and once I got older those thoughts would come to mind, but I told myself that my life was too boring. Most people who write books have gone through something and I haven’t had a hard enough life, so I always put that dream on the back burner. Well, be careful what you say! LOL That was the day the title of my book came to me and I immediately pulled out my iPad and began writing: How I got OVA: Coping through Catastrophe with Christ. I spent those sleepless nights in the hospital writing this book that I pray will bless someone else.