He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will ne impossible for you." Matthew 17:20
I went in on New Year’s Eve 2014 for my MRI which took nearly two hours. They took images with both contrast and non contrast. As I laid on the table prior to dosing off, I began to pray. I prayed this time however, that the Lord have His way. I prayed that no matter what they found I would stand on God’s promises and that I would trust the process. I prayed that whatever fear or doubt that consumed me that by the time I got up from the table I would leave them there. I dozed off during the exam and by the time they woke me I rose with such a renewed spirit, with such pep in my step. I rose knowing that if I just had faith that He can heal, cure and fight the unbeatable, He will certainly do it.
A few days later I called my OBGYN to make an appointment to get the results of the MRI. When I got to her office later that week I can vividly recall sitting at her desk and how she maneuvered over to her desk to pull up the results. She did a once over of the pictures and read the results from the MRI techs to herself. It was as if I could read her mind and I knew she was stunned and really at a loss for words. She sat quietly for a time and then said, "Jasmine, I'm not sure what the techs are telling me. Usually the pictures and their notes help us determine what kind of tumor it is." She showed me the pictures and I noted what the tumor looked like, but that didn't have any variance on me as I didn’t really know what I was looking for. I did notice that the tumor was a nice size and it seemed dense in nature. I wasn't quite sure what that all meant and it was apparent my doctor didn't either, or perhaps she didn't want to say without confirming with someone else. I was reminded that the ca125 test came back negative and although the chances were "less likely" to be cancer, I tried to put cancer out of my mind. My doctor finally said, “I will need to think on this and follow up with you."
About a week later she called and said, “Jasmine, this has literally kept me up every night reviewing the images from your MRI and I finally realized what the techs are trying to tell me. What they are saying is that there isn’t a normal ovary on your left ovary and whatever kind of tumor this is it has taken over your entire ovary. As a result I want to perform surgery to remove it as we do not know what kind of tumor this is. Think about it over the weekend and let me know what you decide”.
We talked a few minutes longer discussing some of my concerns and upon hanging up I immediately spoke with my husband and said, “I'm not having a surgery. I never had one all my life and I'm not getting ready to start”. My husband said, “Jasmine you really need to reconsider. I want you to have this surgery as a preventative measure. Anytime your doctor calls with this kind of concern you should take it very seriously. I don't want to lose my wife and I certainly don't want a doctor telling me that my wife has six months to live because she didn't have a preventative surgery”. After speaking with him I settled on scheduling the surgery. I was still a bit torn but faith...
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